Don’t Ask How I am Doing
I know this might sound like a contrived story, but I assure you it is not. I had the pleasure of this gentleman today, minus the gentleman part. His screen name is- dont_ask_how_i_am_doing:
dont_ask_how_i_am_doing: yes you read the screen name correctly, no need to adjust your monitor
Me: I wasn’t going to, judging by your name. Sooo, what’s going on today?
Him: i am gonna say 3 things that are true right now
Me: oh good, I need to be enlightened. What’s on your mind?
Him: I say don’t ask number one
you don’t care
Me: Actually, I really do care, or else I wouldn’t ask.
Him: number two i don’t care how you are doing and number 3 its about how much money i can spent
and i have an answer
Me: Okay. Got it. You’re here to take me private and give me all of your money.
Him: absolutely not, i am not suggesting that, i am gonna add you to my favs so when i have money i can
i keep it 100 percent real at all times
Me: *eye roll* of course not. So you’ve just wasted my time getting to that point.
Now you just want to add me to your Faves. NICE.
Yeah. Well Number 1: I have enjoyed your company sooo much.
Number 2: I definitely want you to come back to waste more of my time.
Number 3: But promise me you will be just as condescending.
PS: I have to honestly say, I don’t care how you are doing, so I’ll never ask.